Lee Trevino, yard duty and comeuppance

[pim]

Professional golfer Lee Trevino, who was married, was out mowing the front lawn of his house one day back in 1965. A silver Cadillac was cruising past and slowed to a halt. The passenger window opened and a woman leant out and the following exchange took place:

Woman: Do you speak English?

Trevino: Yes I do. How can I help you?

Woman: How much do you charge for yard work?

Trevino: Well, the lady of the house lets me sleep with her.

The car window shut abruptly and the Cadillac sped off.

[slartibartfast]

Very funny man, Mr Trevino:

If you are caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightning, hold up a 1-iron. Not even God can hit a 1-iron.
Lee Trevino

How can they beat me? I've been struck by lightning, had two back operations, and been divorced twice.
Lee Trevino


The older I get the better I used to be!
Lee Trevino


My wife doesn't care what I do when I'm away, as long as I don't have a good time.
Lee Trevino

One of the nice things about the Senior Tour is that we can take a cart and cooler. If your game is not going well, you can always have a picnic.
Lee Trevino

You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex-wives. Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work.
Lee Trevino

You can talk to a fade but a hook won't listen.
Lee Trevino

My divorce came to me as a complete surprise. That's what happens when you haven't been home in eighteen years.
Lee Trevino


I'm not out there just to be dancing around. I expect to win every time I tee up.
Lee Trevino


There is no such thing as natural touch. Touch is something you create by hitting millions of golf balls.
Lee Trevino


I've traveled the world and been about everywhere you can imagine. There's not anything I'm scared of except my wife.
Lee Trevino


I'm actually a very quiet person off the golf course. I talk 150 miles per hour when I'm at the course, but when in private I very seldom ever open my mouth.
Lee Trevino